We all know and love Scott Hoying from the Grammy winning a cappella group Pentatonix. Now, fans have the chance to get to know him on an even deeper level from the perspective of his mother in The Untold Story of Scott Hoying, Pentatonix Star, My Son’s Journey to Find Harmony in Music and Life.
Just in time for Mother’s Day, the book is out now! To talk about the process of uncovering these stories, Scott and his mother Connie Hoying joined GLAAD’s Anthony Allen Ramos for a chat!
“It was so cool to see my mom just so incredibly inspired… calling my friends, going through old videos… the passion was really, really a beautiful thing,” Scott said about his mother’s hard work on the book. He talked about how he helped her remember old stories and how meaningful it was to revisit memories like his coming out.
He continued, “We’d never really revisited that in a lot of years. So, that was really cool. I’m also at an age and feel I’m in this place in life where I can really be present and grateful for that moment and how pivotal that was in my life.”
Connie talked a bit about what that day was like for her when he came out, saying, “When Scott told me, he was super upset. I mean, he was almost sobbing. So, when he told me, I felt like I had to tell him right away, ‘Hey, I love you so much. This doesn’t change anything. Doesn’t change that your family, your sisters, your dad, I know they’re gonna feel that way too.”
She continued, “We’ve all heard those stories of someone who comes out and the parents kick him out, which is beyond my comprehension. But, after that, I just wanted to help him with the journey. I wanted to learn all I could. Granted, I made mistakes… but parents, it’s your child – you’ve loved them, you’ve raised them.”
Scott shared that, “When you’re in the closet and nobody knows who you truly are, then you have no proof to yourself that you’re truly loved,” so her support meant everything to him.
Connie talked about how a friend of hers who is a counselor asked if she could use the chapter of the book about Scott coming out as a resource for parents of queer kids, before the book came out, to which she of course replied ‘yes!’ (As long as they signed an NDA!)
Scott shared that he hopes parents who read the book learn from his mother, “I feel like you can be an example of a parent just using love as a north star when supporting their child and them coming out and that leading to success.”
She then talked a bit about her relationship with God and how it’s evolved since learning more about LGBTQ issues. She spoke about how in Catholicism, “They say that you can be gay, but you can’t act on it. What? I just find it crazy.” She continued, “Then Scott couldn’t get married in the Catholic Church. They won’t acknowledge his marriage. So, obviously I had issues with that. I haven’t gone back to the church but I still am very spiritual.”
She added, “God and I, we have a great relationship – and that’s what’s important to me. Not a building with a priest in it.”
Scott talked about how as an artist, it is so much easier to create when you’re being your true self, “Just being able to be your authentic self takes away the layers of having to be in a character… You always make the best art when you’re with your friends and y’all are just making something you love.”
Connie spoke about her endless list of PPMs or ‘Proud Parent Moments’ she’s had over the years for her 3 kids. But in writing this book, she’s had the opportunity to hear “how many people throughout his life love him and who talk about his heart and his good, how he wants to help people and wants everyone to be successful. Just all the wonderful things…When you have so many people saying what an incredible heart he has… it makes a parent pretty proud too. Because I felt like I raised a good son.”
To close, Scott shared that in the book, there is a QR code that will take fans to a website with photos and other exciting content including a brand new song called Pray!”
Scott said, “It’s ironically a really, really fun song. It sounds like a gospel song, but it’s about how ridiculous the notion of praying the gay away is, and how that’s not a thing you can do.”
To learn more, visit www.conniehoying.com. The Untold Story of Scott Hoying, Pentatonix Star, My Son’s Journey to Find Harmony in Music and Life is out now! Get your copy here!
